Have you been craving a break from all the hard work, effort & force you’ve been operating from?
Believe it or not, I can relate!
It’s been almost 6 months since I’ve shared self-rescue wisdom with my community because at the end of the day, I just needed to practice what I preach & take a break.
I took some MUCH-needed time off from offering value to my community back in November so I could rest, reflect & re-assess my business & my life & what was supposed to be a 1-month break actually turned into a 6-month sabbatical!
This is the longest I’ve ever gone without connecting with my community & you know what?
It was exactly what I needed. :)
After spending a LOT of time & energy last year building & offering self-rescue support & value in my online community I began to experience chronic stress & overwhelm because of the consistent content I was posting.
As you have probably heard me say before, chronic stress & overwhelm are some of the indicators for the beginning stages of burnout so ding, ding, ding…
A wake up call that I need to make some changes in how I was working!
Using my body as a barometer for my soul, I gave myself permission to take a break from the things that were draining my energy so I could regroup & figure out a smarter way of interacting & connecting with my community.
Taking time for rest, reflection & re-assessment on a regular basis is actually something I HIGHLY recommend to everyone so that you don’t get off track or distracted by bright shiny objects & activities that might end up draining you!
And you know what?
After reflecting upon & re-assessing my efforts, I realized I had been operating from a place of hard work, effort & force trying to add value to my online community!
No wonder I was stressed out & overwhelmed.
Over-working, over-giving & over-producing has a tendency to cause that!
And, after turning 50 in January (a milestone that I am proud to claim!) & recently moving into a new home on my own in the small mountain town that I live, I’ve really come to realize that the time I have left to enjoy a business & a life I love that fuels & excites me is dwindling.
Now more than ever I’ve started to pay really close attention to where I spend my time & more importantly, my energy, which is why I am more committed than ever to simplify the way I live, love, lead & work and create a business & life that works FOR me rather than against me.
And, what I really needed was rest & more time & spaciousness to implement & create business, marketing & community-building strategies that actually allow me to work in a softer, smarter way, which was difficult to do when I was filling up every hour of every day like I was for awhile last year.
As a result of my sabbatical, I’ve gotten the much needed rest I needed & been able to come up with simpler, easier ways to offer value & content, one of which you’ll learn more about today.
But before I go into the self-rescue opportunity I want to share with you, I want to share for a moment some of the feelings I grappled with during my sabbatical, feelings I think are unfortunately normal for so many of the working women I know who are trying to create a more balanced life for themselves.
You see, dear one…
Even though I was giving myself permission to rest, reflect & re-asses what wasn’t working from last year, there were many moments over the past couple of months where I also felt the following…
- Fear & stress about not connecting with my community as often as I “should” be.
- Shame that I couldn’t make what had worked so well for others work for me.
- Guilt over not working hard or producing as much I used to in the past.
- Lack & scarcity over clients I missed out on because I wasn’t connecting with my community regularly.
In fact, even though I eat, sleep, breath & practice self-rescue regularly & know the importance of mindset when it comes to creating a life & a business that I love, these feelings & beliefs were actually sabotaging the rest, reflection & re-assessment I’d given myself permission to take!
So what’s with all the head trash, despite seeing the value & understanding the importance of my choice to go on sabbatical?
You see, dear one, something I’ve been reflecting on lately is that we live in a masculinized society that STILL values productivity, efficiency & achievement over everything else.
In some ways, it’s hard-wired into our DNA but it has also been handed down generationally from the women before us & the patriarchal norms & structures that have been imposed on women for centuries.
Sociologically speaking, the kind of rest & spaciousness I was craving & took for myself is often seen in our society as a sign of weakness, laziness or failure despite it being essential for our physical, mental & emotional health!
As a result, women in the workforce today are finding themselves in a double-bind more often than not….
We’re shamed & looked down upon if we don’t work hard to prove our value & worth & we’re burned out & running on empty if we do.
In fact, I learned about a woman recently by the name of Tricia Hershey who wrote a book called Rest Is Resistance, where she states that because of the patriarchal norms & toxic structures still in place, she looks at rest as “a call to action and manifesto for those who are sleep deprived, searching for justice, and longing to be liberated from the oppressive grip of Grind Culture”.
And you know what?
I think I agree.
Rest can be a powerful form of resistance to the oppressive structures & belief systems that have been exploiting women’s time, energy & resources for centuries & is actually something that can deepen our connection to ourselves & help us heal our life if we were to wholeheartedly value & embrace rest, joy, play & pleasure as a culture.
Sadly, there are still a LOT of antiquated, patriarchal norms and expectations imposed on how women should live, work and relate to the world that contribute greatly to the growing levels of burnout being seen in women compared to men today!
Additionally, work that’s traditionally associated with women & femininity such as care work, emotional labor and domestic chores (which are often unpaid, underpaid or invisible and require a lot of time and energy that could be spent on rest and self-care) are often devalued & still predominantly left up to women to manage.
In fact, I heard a statistic at a women’s conference recently where it was stated that women have to work harder (i.e. more time, energy & effort) than their male counterparts for the same amount of pay.
As long as social mores & inequality such as this continues, women having to work hard to prove their value & worth will persist.
THIS is why it’s up to us as women to resist by learning how to work in softer, smarter ways that allow us to enjoy & appreciate all aspects of our life instead of chasing the imposed upon culture of “hustle & grind” that’s been burning women out since entering the workforce.
Consider for a moment some of the many benefits of using rest as a form of resistance…
- It would allow us to reclaim our agency, autonomy and dignity.
- It would enable us to nourish ourselves, heal ourselves and connect with ourselves and others.
- It would create space for creativity, joy and liberation.
- It would disrupt the capitalist logic that equates our worth with our output.
- It would challenge the gendered division of labor that burdens women and other marginalized groups with disproportionate amounts of work.
In fact, rest is one of the most radical things we can do to reprogram ourselves & retrain society as a whole to learn how to function more effectively in both our personal & professional lives!
At the end of the day, what we really need is a softer, easier way to live, love, lead, work & thrive as a culture.
So, if you’re been running on empty or burning the candle at both ends, dear one, I want to remind you that…
- Rest is NOT a luxury, it is a necessity.
- Rest is not selfish, it is radical.
- Rest is not passive, it is active.
- Rest is not a waste of time, it is a way of life.
- Rest is not something we should feel guilty about, it is something we should celebrate and demand.
- Rest is not only good for us, it is good for the world.
Most importantly… learning how to take time for rest, play, joy & pleasure on a regular basis actually pushes back on the social norms that no longer serve us & allows us to create a life that we LOVE.
It also helps us recondition the compulsion to over-work, over-give & over-produce while giving us the time we need to pause, reflect & re-assess more effective ways to manage our time & energy so we don’t sacrifice our soul, sanity or health.
So, with that in mind…
Are you ready to learn how to make time for more rest, joy, play & pleasure in your life?
If so, one of the most important things you can learn is the art of energy management, which is all about using your body as a barometer for your soul to identify what drains you & making conscious choices & decisions about how you’re managing your time AND your energy!
Wouldn’t it be great to know how to manage your energy more effectively so you can have more time & spaciousness to rest & do ALL the things in your life that nourish, fuel, energize & excite you?
So, with that in mind…
I invite you to jumpstart your very own self-rescue so you can turn your own struggle with over-working, over-giving & over-producing into a softer, smarter way to live, love, lead, work & thrive from a place of power, softness, ease & grace with a *COMPLIMENTARY* Self-Rescue Assessment, Toolkit & Adventure that I created to help you assess your energy drains & learn the 3 keys to self-rescue that will help you become your very own hero!
Jess Bonasso, also known as The Self Care Goddess, is a Brave Life Catalyst & Self-Rescue Coach, Author & Keynote Speaker who has been teaching worn out working wonder women learn how to save themselves since 2007.
After learning how to unravel the socialization & self-sabotage that led to burnout & self-sacrifice during corporate-climbing 20’s & business-building 30’s, Jess created the Brave-Hearted Way, a personalized self-rescue compass & road map that teaches worn out working wonder women everywhere how to save themselves from the hard work, effort & force they’ve been operating from so they can grow their power, heal their life & thrive from a place of power, softness, ease & grace.
Not only does Jess have a wealth of personal experience in mastering the art of self-rescue, but she is also a published co-author of two books (Speaking Your Truth: Courageous Stories from Inspiring Women (Vol.2) & Wisdom of Heroes: If A T-Shirt Could Talk) with close to 20 years’ experience using the Enneagram personality system with her clients along with a highly effective form of cellular trauma release therapy known as The Journey Method® which can unravel at the root level anything that limits your happiness, health, wealth, or wholeness.
Be sure to follow Jess on social media where you’ll receive daily inspiration & support on how to heal & fuel your life so you can embrace your greatness on Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, or LinkedIn! :)